Valentine’s is just around the corner, and if you have a bae, you’re probably doing what I do every time I hear a sexy song come on the radio: mentally rehearsing the sexy routine you MIGHT do on Vday but probably won’t because choreography is hard.
Here’s the good news though: a super sexy dance does NOT require fancy tricks. Bae will likely be just as impressed if you flip your hair and climb the pole than as if you did a bird of paradise or some double jointed Marion Crampe shit.
But I know how annoying it is to get some vague tips for HOW to do a routine and like… you don’t have any moves for a routine in your skill level. So please: as someone who once taught routines at bachelorette parties, let me get you on this.
You can use all of these moves or just a few of them and even repeat yourself. If you’re flowing and feeling yourself, it will look awesome, so don’t get too hung up on execution or difficulty. I’ll keep adding more throughout the week, and add some gifs of the moves so you can get the full affect.
I’ll also put my money where my mouth is on this and make a short routine out of these moves to prove it can be done–and that you can look damn good while doing it.
You can kill like 15 seconds of your song just by walking. Here’s how to make it worth watching:
-Walk slow (duh), drag the toe of the foot you’re stepping with (HACK: this helps you keep your balance in heels or while exaggerating your ankle cross as you saunter).
-Pause to bend over your front leg, drag your hands up it, and flip your hair. (Slo-mo ben and snap, shoutout to Legally Blonde!)
-Do some more bending when you make it to the pole: when you’re about arm’s distance away, drag your hands down the pole as you bend over with straight legs and an arched back. Dip your head and roll it half-moon to the other side and SNAP that hair as you come back up. (Pro tip: definitely roll your head to the SIDE of the pole, lest you smack your face on the pole).
-Work a pole walk. Again, the focus here is WASTING TIME. Walk incredibly slow. Keep it interesting with hair and body touching. Again, bae will be enthralled if you are legitimately feeling yourself, don’t worry about popping tricks.
2. Half pirouette
These are great because they look fancy without the risks attached to a full pirouette (ie. getting stuck, losing your balance, hitting your leg on the pole–these are all things that would definitely happen to me with my luck during a sexy performance).
And here’s the other great thing: when you end up with your back on the pole, you can kill MORE TIME doing stuff you’ve already done because it looks different from a new angle. SCORE.
I highly recommend spacing these out. They’re exciting in moderation, but clumped together they lose that affect. You also want to be very careful not to anticipate a spin while doing a sexy-ish dance: fully let yourself fall into it, and don’t give it away by sneaking an extra step, etc. The appeal here is having fully control of the spin and riding it all the way out to the floor. (Then woohoo!!!! Enjoy more time wasting opportunities on the ground! Roll around, tick tock yo booty, stripper push yourself up–so many possibilities).
4. Spins Pt. 2:
Get some contrast between spin 1 and spin 2, if you can. If you’re doing a front spin, try a back spin for #2–falling lady is nice and simple, and looks really different from a fireman or attitude spin.
Again, the appeal here is the control you have while. Don’t even worry if you can’t do much once you get up there: focus on climbing slowly, with a bit of body wave and some head rolls, if you can. Then sit for a bit, stretch out your legs if you can, and try some waves or see saws to get back down. Again, if you’re selling it with hips and hair, you do NOT need tricks.
Once on the ground, rinse and repeat the first three steps! You have half of a routine!
More coming soon 😉