Truly excellent post from a friend about catcalling below. She wrote this before The Video came out, which makes it even harder to dismiss.
I think what people miss about “sweet” comments is that they’re never really about us as women, or making us feel good. It’s just marking territory: this is my domain, and you’re trespassing, so I’m going to let you know I’m the one in control here.
Why is it so much easier to believe that women are too stupid to know when they’re being complimented than it is to believe that “sweet” comments are intimidating and MEANT to intimidate?
I have so many strong feelings about this (having been harassed almost every day I have ever left my house for 8 years in New York) that it’s hard not to ramble. But I will say that, for how vocal men have been about their “right” to “say hello,” I find it hard to believe that any man could feel good about hearing “You have a good day sweetheart” 12 times a day from a bunch of leering strangers for the rest of his life.
So why is it so hard for us as a society to categorize this as wrong?
Why are we so quick to tell women they’re mistaken about feeling hassled, intimidated, and yes, harassed?
Finally: can we all acknowledge how ludicrous it it to call it “saying hello” when we know damn well a dude would never DARE pull this on another dude? Slow clap for this hashtag….