Starlight Pole Show: In Which I Accidentally Blog Hop

OH SNAP. So I went to a pole show yesterday. And it. Was. Awesome.

I dragged my shy, non-poling male friend, and I think he was scared. But witnessing his Imagecomplete bewilderment was half the fun.

I know none of you were about to take the R train all the way down to Bay Ridge for this, so let me tell you a little bit about the show. In alphabetic-als, because I’m really tired you guys.

A: Aerialists! There were two hoop girls, and they killed it. See, you can do stuff both near and far from the ground on a pole, but when you’re on a hoop, you’ve got the same odds of landing on your neck for the ENTIRE PERFORMANCE. Brass balls. These ladies got em.

ALSO, apparently you’re supposed to wear leg covering when you hoop, but one particularly bad ass girl decided to pole and hoop (Hey bro, I hear you like bruises…), so, she was bare legged. #Swag. The other is my girl Lauryn, who I’ve actually never seen dance before this, and she completely blew me away. The confidence… the grace… and of course, her amazing costume which actually wasn’t a surprise because I knew she was artistic like that. Anyway, I want to hoop now, except that pole has taught me nothing if not that ALL AERIAL ARTS SUCK AND ARE HARD.

B: BOYS: I’ve seen guys hit the pole once in a while, but dude last night KILLED it. Most guys do a lot of strength stuff and skip over the lyrical, but last night’s sole male performer was pure pole poetry… and he definitely did some shit I’ve never seen before, so hell yeah to creativity. He also showed up later in a Pole Threesome (TM? must be? because I have never seen this craziness before), in which he supported a girl by HER FOOT, by squeezing it with HIS LEGS. So many questions. Epic. Moving on.

C: Chair dance: So technically, this didn’t involve a chair, but the emcee of the event called her boyfriend out of the crowd, sat him Indian-style against a pole, and did quite possibly the most spine-tingly sexy dance I’ve ever seen in my life. True story. The hair on the back of my neck stood up. And I was close enough to the stage to see him mouth, “You are BEAUTIFUL,” and “I love you” during the dance, so, yeah. Way too much cute/sexy/poignant for me to even handle. Amazing.

D: Doubles: There were so many great twosomes and threesomes last night, including an incredible booty-popping number with ECP’s owner. I love when dancers are actually capable of crazy, crazy shit on the pole… but they can also break it down and have fun with the booty. Work.

E: Entertainers: So last night I learned that there’s a difference between being an incredible dancer/trickster, and being an entertainer. I realized this when a fairly new dancer (1 year, according to the program… that bitch) completely owned the audience with a few well timed pauses, smiles, and eye-bats during her (slinky, confident, gorgeous) performance. I find this totally inspiring, because I can’t do shoulder mounts and shit, but yes, I can flip my hair (!!!) I have a shot, you guys!!!!

F: Feedback: I also learned last night that you can’t just chill at a pole show. You need to yell, and scream, and encourage the dancers. This was new to me, since I’ve seen most performers on YouTube.

That’s all for now, because it’s been a busy weekend and I’m feeling lazy.

Have you guys ever been to a live pole show? What did you think? Did you feel discouraged or inspired?

Have you ever been in one? Is it as nerve-wracking as I’m guessing it is?

Fill me in!

Meanwhile, be SUPER jealous, because Pantera was at the show last night and she is both an incredible dancer and out of her damn mind. This is her. Really, how strong can a person be? Ridiculous.

Happy twirls (and hoops, and whatever the fuck else you guys are making look easy),



  1. I love pole shows! I have performed in two fairly big shows (250+ audience) that one of my studios put on, and it’s such a blast! While it’s fun to perform at small shows at the studios as well, there’s such a different energy when performing on a real stage in front of a real audience, and I absolutely love it. It helps that the studio lets students and instructors of all levels perform, from the girls who are barely climbing to the rockstars who are throwing handsprings and shoulder mounts in like they’re fireman spins, and so you quickly learn that everyone has something to offer, no matter what level. And yes, it is a little nerve-wrecking, but it gets easier every time:)

    I’m glad your first pole show was a good experience!

  2. Cathy, this is Diva, the emcee. Thank you for an AWESOME review!!!! And the dude on stage was a gay BFF, and that’s exactly why I could be so nasty with him!! He was actually mouthing, “fuck you bitch I hate you!” I read him our paragraph and we laughed forever. Your support is amazing!!!

    • Bwahahahaha, this is why I’m a blogger and NOT a reporter 😀 thanks for setting the record straight. that’s actually hilarious… but doesn’t take away from how fabulous your performance was. glad (though embarrassed) that I got to tell you how much I liked it!!! 🙂

  3. Thank you for a great blog!!! I was the pole/hoop performer with no leg covering 😉 Thanks for the kind words, and speaking of Brass Balls….the studio where I teach is called Brass Ovaries in Austin, TX!

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